Hitting The Bottle

Mr Forrester left at half past eight this morning in order to catch his train back to London. He left behind a package he desired be passed on to Mr Miles, who remains ill in bed with a strain of influenza. I check on Mr Miles at regular intervals and have taken him a hot water bottle. This brought back vivid memories of my first day as a footman here. An elderly aunt of Sir Geoffrey's had fallen ill and the first interaction I had with the family 'above stairs' was the taking up of a hot water bottle to her room. Of course, that bottle was not a modern, rubber affair, like the one I just took up to Mr Miles: Sir Geoffrey's Great-Aunt received from a nervous, tentative footman, (whose white-tie was a little erratically tied) an earthenware 'bed warmer' complete with cork stopper. How times have changed in the hot water bottle department.

I am as discreet as possible as butler of Carstone House, but I shall now reveal a secret that if the News of The World ever found out, would be plastered sensationally on their front page on Sunday. 'Tis a dark secret........

Every hot water bottle owned by Sir Geoffrey Carstone has a cover with his family crest and motto upon it.

In fact practically every piece of linen, and certainly every piece of stationery in the house, also has the Carstone family crest upon it, so perhaps my exclusive is not quite as sensational as tabloid editors would have hoped.

I said I was discreet...